


Shipping Out

by tinzelda



Series: Scraps [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Inspired by Art, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-20 16:14:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3656817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinzelda/pseuds/tinzelda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky’s about to ship out, and Steve sees him off at the station.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shipping Out

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [A Goodbye Kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/108559) by theonekierce. 



> A big thank you to Jo (jmathieson) for cheerful, helpful, and speedy beta. Thanks, writing buddy!
> 
> Thanks also to perclexed, without whom I wouldn’t have seen the gorgeous art by theonekierce, which was the inspiration for this little story. I just fell in love with this picture the moment I saw it!

When Steve got home, Bucky was sitting at the kitchen table waiting. Steve had already decided not to say anything about Dr. Erskine or anything else that had happened since Bucky left him at the fair, but the secret simmered just under his skin, making him a little uneasy.

“Hey, pal.” Bucky rose from his chair and picked up his jacket just as Steve was hanging his on the hook by the door. “I thought you weren’t gonna make it in time. I should have left fifteen minutes ago. I’m gonna miss my train.”

The apprehension sitting in Steve’s stomach turned even more sour when he realized that he’d missed most of this last chance to spend an evening with Bucky, even if he would have had to share him with a couple of dames in a crowded dance hall. “I thought you were shipping out in the morning.”

“Yeah, but I gotta report tonight. C’mon, you can walk me to the station.”

Bucky finished buttoning his coat and slung his pack over one shoulder. He was distractingly handsome in his uniform. The perfect soldier. Steve waited for the rush of jealousy Bucky’s uniform usually made him feel, but it didn’t come now that he had a chance at a uniform of his own.

“C’mon, Steve, I mean it. I’m late.”

Bucky was already in the hall outside the door, and all the way down the stairs and out onto the sidewalk, Steve hurried to catch up. He had to take three steps to Bucky’s every two. He felt a little chilly in just his shirtsleeves. He’d rushed out of the apartment so fast he’d forgotten to grab his jacket.

“I wish I were going with you,” Steve said. “I wish—”

“Well, I don’t.” Bucky stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and turned to look at Steve. “I’m glad you’re staying here. You gotta stop trying to enlist. You gotta promise me.”

“Bucky—”

Bucky stepped close and grabbed Steve’s elbow. “No, Steve, I’m not kidding around.”

Steve knew that Bucky didn’t think less of him for being small, that Bucky only wanted him to be safe. But it still stung, feeling weak, almost inconsequential in the eyes of the person who mattered the most. Bucky’s hand tightened around Steve’s arm and gave it a little shake. “Promise me.”

“I promise,” Steve said.

It wasn’t a lie, exactly, but it sure as hell wasn’t the truth. The guilt Steve felt faded almost immediately when he saw the look on Bucky’s face, the way the tension melted out of his body. Steve could manage a little guilt if it meant Bucky wouldn’t worry about him.

“You mean it? You won’t be taking a bus to an enlistment office in Hartford tomorrow morning?”

“I promise. I won’t try again.”

“Good,” Bucky said with a sigh. “That’s good.”

Bucky gave Steve another shake, gentle this time, then let go of his arm. He walked a few steps away and, when Steve managed to catch up again, flashed a smile at him.

They got to the station with a few minutes to spare, but the platform was empty.

“Where are all the other guys?” Steve asked. “Isn’t the whole unit shipping out?”

“Yeah, but they’re already gone. I pulled a few strings so I could stay a little longer.”

“You have strings?”

Bucky laughed and threw his arm over Steve’s shoulders. Maybe it was meant be a casual gesture, but Steve shifted, turning his body toward Bucky’s and hugging him tight. They were saying goodbye, probably for a long time, so Steve figured he could get away with it without Bucky thinking it was strange. Besides, there wasn’t a soul around. 

“I’m proud of you, Buck,” Steve said. 

Bucky pulled away. “You shouldn’t be,” he said with a frown.

Steve let out a disbelieving laugh. “But look at you. They made you a sergeant. You—”

“I didn’t enlist.”

“What do you mean?” Steve nudged Bucky’s shoulder with his fist. “Where’ve you been all this time if you weren’t in basic?”

“No, I mean—” Bucky was avoiding Steve’s gaze. “I was drafted. You just assumed I signed up, and I didn’t know how to tell you. And I know how much you want to go. But I’m not brave or patriotic or any of that. I’m scared to death.”

Steve felt a stab of fear in his gut. He hadn’t let himself think about Bucky being on the front. “You’ll be okay. I know it. You must know what you’re doing, right? If they promoted you already?” Bucky still looked miserable, so Steve tried a joke. “Besides, I think maybe you’re too stupid to die. Too darn stubborn, that’s for sure.”

Bucky gave Steve a sad smile. “I’m not afraid of dying, you idiot. I could get hit by a bus crossing the street right here at home. I just—” He looked away again, and Steve felt a sudden sick certainly that Bucky was holding back tears. When he next spoke, his voice came out low and gruff. “I don’t want to leave you.”

A flood of warmth swept over Steve, coursing through his veins. He tried to fight the feeling. Bucky couldn’t mean it the way Steve wanted him to.

“I’m worried about what’ll happen without me here when you get sick,” Bucky said.

There it was again: Bucky feeling he had to look out for Steve, because it wasn’t a question of _whether_ he would get sick, but _when_. “I’ll be fine.”

“No, you listen to me.” He grabbed Steve, one hand on each shoulder. “You take care of yourself. You make sure you get enough to eat. And if you think you’re getting sick, you go to my folks. Ma will take care of you. She promised me.”

“Bucky—”

“And you stop the stupid fights, do you hear me? If I get back and you’re not waiting for me, I swear to God—” He was gazing down at Steve with a frantic look in his eye. “I can’t do it.” He was still gripping Steve’s shoulders, hard. “I can’t leave without—”

And then Bucky kissed him.

It was over almost before Steve even realized what was happening. All he could think of was how strong the familiar scent of Bucky’s pomade was with his face pressed into Bucky’s neck. Steve felt a little dizzy.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky whispered, still holding Steve in a fiercely tight embrace. He planted another kiss on Steve’s forehead, then pulled away, bolting to the train.

The sound of the compartment door slamming shook Steve out of his shock. He called Bucky’s name, but the train was already moving.

“No, wait!”

He stumbled forward a few steps, waving his arms. He couldn’t let Bucky leave like this. He broke into a run, parallel to the train, trying to catch up. He had to sidetrack around a wooden shed, and already his lungs were starting to tighten up on him.

“No!”

As if in response, the train slowed and hissed to a halt. Steve threw up a prayer of thanks. He was past the boarding area, and there was a fence that ran along the edge of the platform, so he couldn’t get close to the doors. He scanned the windows, hoping to see Bucky’s face, but it was too dark in most places, and where the light did reach, it reflected off the glass, making it impossible to see inside.

He yelled out Bucky’s name. The sound echoed around him in the night. There was no one around to hear, and Steve wasn’t sure he’d care if there was.

A door opened about twenty feet ahead, and Bucky’s head popped out of the compartment. “Steve?”

Steve rushed up to the fence and stretched out his hand. A brilliant smile spread over Bucky’s face, and he leaned way out, holding on with one hand, hooking his foot on the door frame so that he could grab Steve’s arm. It wasn’t close enough. Steve pushed up on his tiptoes, throwing his arms out to catch Bucky around the neck, then felt Bucky’s hand on his back, steadying him.

His lips were warm and soft against Steve’s. It was perfect.

But Bucky was being pulled away. The train was moving again, and Steve had to let go of Bucky and clutch at the fence to keep from falling forward. Bucky was still hanging off the side of the train, a huge smile on his face. When he got too far away for Steve to really see his features, his arm came up in a wave before he ducked back into the compartment.

Steve pressed the back of his hand to his mouth, but he couldn’t keep his happiness bottled up—it burst out of him as laughter. He’d been dreading the lonely walk home, but now he felt like he could run all the way there and farther without ever having to stop and catch his breath.

The End


End file.
